Behind Every Smile

If you look closely

Through every tear

There is a memory

Some good, some bad

But for each tear I cry

A part of me is there for you to see

The same is true for every smile

Every time I laugh

Or every time I sing

For every thing I do

My emotions come out to play

And they wish to reveal much to you

A smile isn't simply a smile

For there is always a reason behind it

Sometimes I'm happy about something that just happened

Other times, perhaps I have just had an interesting thought

Or perhaps I'm remembering a joyful moment

And sometimes it's just for another's benefit

You know those moments

When you're really upset

But don't feel like explaining things

And just want the world to think you're okay

So you hold back the screams and the tears

And put on the smile that never reaches your eyes

A laugh doesn't always mean that I found something funny

Many times, it does

But, not always

Sometimes I'm so angry that I laugh, right before I yell

Sometimes it's because I'm scared or nervous

And other times I probably couldn't explain myself

Sometimes a laugh just escapes

And I'm not really sure why I laughed

I just did

This happens when I cry too

Sometimes I don't know why I cry

Though many times I do

Often when I cry

I am upset or extremely overwhelmed

Sometimes, again I am just scared or nervous

But there are times for happy tears too

If you have found a way to truly touch my heart

It is likely that I will cry

Weddings, babies, heartfelt words

Death, funerals, & heartbreak

The unknown and sometimes just too much has happened

Out of frustration

And simply my body knows no other way to react

So I cry

I often sing when emotional

Though by emotional, I don't always mean sad

Or even angry

Sometimes I am just so happy that I want the world to hear my song

Music has always been an outlet for me

To express what's inside my heart and inside my mind

And so is also true of the written word

But of course

You can see that right now

There are many ways in which I express myself

As is true of most of us

We all have our ways to show each other how we feel

Some don't say it out loud

They don't even write it

They show you simply by the way they choose to act

And they say actions speak louder than words

Sometimes silence speaks volumes

A wordless moment can say everything a thousand words never could

My heart is on my sleeve

This has opened me up to much abuse

But I know no other way to be

Though lately I wear a smile to conceal much hurt

Though by doing so

I am finding my way through

And when you see my smile

I wonder what you will take from it

Whether I am running off with the mouth

Or sitting there quietly

There is much I am saying

You just need to pay attention