Moving Into the Light

"Listening to your heart is not simple. Finding out who you are is not simple. It
takes a lot of hard work and courage to get to know who you are and what
you want._Sue Bender

In 1999, I was attending college. I wrote a memoir for school that took
me to places I really had to revisit. I didn't know when I started out
writing my story what the outcome would be. By the time I finished, I
did. I called the memoir, Moving Into the Light. Here are a few
suggestion for writing a memoir. Put some distance between you and the
time you write about, yet not too much. Don't worry about the outcome,
simply get it down on paper. Write this for yourself, it is your truth
and that is all that matters. Do try to stick to the facts though, be
honest, you don't want to make stuff up. And write as deeply as you can.
Start at a time that was meaningful, perhaps an event, or a memory of
someone you once loved and lost. You don't have to write your story from
the day you were born, unless you want to. You can write a series of
events that took place over a period of time. Once you start writing, a
theme will unfold naturally. Try to use all your senses when writing
with as much detail as possible. My own memoir started out with a
carving I was having for a food my mother made when I was a child. I
found myself writing about the beginning of the relationship with my
second husband who I met in 1973.

Even though my intention was to write myself into the light, I found myself writing
some really painful and sad experiences. This is where I want to
encourage you to keep going if this happens to you. There is growth and
healing taking place by simply writing about your memories. You are
releasing. It's okay, if you cry, let the tears flow. Those tears will
cleanse you. Find someone to talk with about your feelings as they come
up. Of course, you want someone that is supportive. People tell me all
the time, I'm worried someone will see what I am writing. Therefore,
they are afraid to let it all out. Keep your writing somewhere safe.
Write what is comfortable for you. The more you delve into your memoir
the more will be revealed. Be courageous, keep going. Keep in mind there
is light at the end of the tunnel. It's important to acknowledge what
you have experienced.

My professor wrote, " This is very beautiful, Lillian" on the last page.
The writing outcome of my memoir was about forgiveness. Excerpt from
memoir:"Forgiveness hasn't come easy for me. Thank God for new
beginnings. I look out of my living room window and I see the sun
glistening on the fall colored trees that are swaying in the wind as I
listen to the rattle of my windows and the tinkling of the wind chime.
My feelings are valid. I will listen as I stay present to all that is
around me. I remain true to myself, speak from my heart and love from my
deepest being. I will come from a loving place. Not a stone will go
unturned in my walk through life, with both of my eyes open, as I
continue to grow and change. My focus is the beauty that surrounds me.
My guide is the internal wisdom and intuition that God has provided. I
will honor, acknowledge, and nurture all that I am. I forgive myself,
for I am but a human being."