Beneath

There was a time long ago

Or maybe not so long ago at all

When I couldn't feel Your presence

Though You were right there with me

Upon a tornardo, I spun

Wreckless, I tore through town

Doing as I pleased

Never fully facing the consequences

Giving into peer pressure

Partying it up

Staying up late

Hey let me take another hit

The lines between my realities blurred

A yearning for something better stirred

But getting the nerve to change

Can be very difficult to say the least

Beneath the fear and uncertainty

Desire for a good life beat within my chest

I always told myself 

Someday I would find a way

Many mistakes were made

I tried to lie, cheat, and steal my way through life

Always trying to excuse what I did

By blaming those who I felt had ruined me

It was never my fault you see

The blame shifted from person to person

My parents, kids at school, and so on

I'd have turned out okay if it wasn't for them

Beneath the self pity and self loathing

Desire for forgiveness and love flowed within my veins

One day I will stop making excuses

And learn how to really live

Beneath the wreckage

A beautiful soul begins to emerge

Over time, healing began

Slow, but it's been forward progress

You never gave up on me

Even when others did

Even when I gave up on myself

Loving me through it all

I'd run from You

Ashamed of all I have done

Angry at the world for what had been done to me

So sure I could do things my way

Each time I ran

You patiently waited

For me to come back home

Drawing me close when I came through the door

I yearn to live a life of significance

One that gives love to all around me

To make a life worth living

One that will be worth remembering

Beneath a sinner's heart

The will and the courage to do the right thing grew

Thank you for wiping away my sins

For seeing in me what I simply couldn't see