October-Build up to a kiss (two in one lol)

One of the best experiences in the month of October happened to me this year. What led up to the greatest October of my existence began this summer. I guess it actually began in January. But the heart of this story began in August and that is where I will start. 

I had known Doug since January, but until summer arrived, we'd barely talked. There was actually a period of time when none of us saw him for awhile. But, when he reappeared in our lives, things began to change. He and I started talking on our own, apart from the group of friends that we'd shared. Upon getting to know him, I began to see what a great person he really is. In fact, the more time that passed, I realized he was becoming my best friend. It was all happening so quickly. He went from acquaintance to friend to best friend to the man I was falling in love with.

I didn't know how he felt about me though. A couple of friends had said they saw a connection there and it was something I had noticed when he and I hung out, but I was still scared. One night while chatting online, I got brave enough to ask him how he felt and to tell him how I felt. He admitted to having feelings for me, but thought that we'd be better suited as friends. I was so hurt and so confused. I thought, "How could I be so wrong? I really thought it was going somewhere." 

A day later, he asked me to go to the last Brewers game of the season, said they'd been his sister's tickets and that they couldn't go. So he, two of our friends, and myself went to the game a couple of days later. He picked me up and we went to a bar that had a shuttle to the stadium to wait for our friends to show up. You could cut the tension with a knife that evening. We were having a good time, but fighting the chemistry on both sides was awkward. Even after the game and we all sat at the bar again, eating and talking, it was fun, but weird. He took me home, walked me to the door, and then we hugged. I so wanted to kiss him that night, but was so scared and I sensed that maybe he felt the same.

So, the next day, I asked him to come by and watch movies with me. He agreed and for awhile that night, it was still so awkward. During the first movie, we'd move closer to one another and then he'd move away just a little. That process ended sometime during the second movie. At that point, we were sitting so close that we were nearly on one another's lap and it felt so weird being so close and yet feeling so far away. At some point, I was looking at his hand and noticed how red it was. I touched his hand and made a comment about that and about how warm his skin was. Then I leaned into him a little bit and he then put his arm around me. I swear I felt like I was 16 and had never experienced any of this in my life. We adjusted our positions a few times and eventually, I was so close to his face that I could feel his warm breath on my own face. I was so nervous. I wanted this, I had wanted it for awhile to be totally honest.

Maybe 10 minutes before the end of the second movie, which was Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, we finally looked right at each other and then we leaned in toward one another. I had one hand on his face and I closed my eyes. The kiss I'd been anticipating for awhile finally happened. And then we kept kissing. After awhile, I had to send him home because we both had a lot to do the next day. I was so giddy and lightheaded. Again, I was taken back to my teenage years. I hadn't felt like this ever, not even back when I had my first kiss. It was a euphoric feeling, one I still have. October 4th is a day etched into my mind even still.

And October 11th was our first official date. I made a Velveeta chicken alfredo mix. It was a first, but I did well. After that, we went to see Trouble with the Curve, a Clint Eastwood movie. It was a great movie, I recommend watching it. He then walked me to the door, as he always does in his gentlemen style way. He came into hang out for a little while and then again, sent him on his way so he could get sleep for work and I could take care of my own responsibilities. It was a wonderful evening, one that again is etched into my mind.

October 16th is when he asked me to make it official, to become boyfriend and girlfriend. He seemed nervous and it was so cute. He was holding my hand while we were in the car after bowling league and he said, "So, do you want to make it official?" Of course I said yes. ;)

Since then, we have helped each other through a lot. He helped me move, alone. But, we proved we're a good team. And then my time to help him came when his mom died a week ago and he needed me to be his rock. We make one another laugh and smile. He inspires me to go after my dreams and to do more. We finish one another's sentences and often think the same thing. It's only been a few months since our story really began, but it feels like I have known him for a lifetime. Being with him feels right, natural. I have never been this happy, felt this cherished or respected. He is my love and my best friend. In this aspect of my life, I am right where I want to be, where I belong.